I've reached that point in my time at home. The dreaded halfway point, after which it's all downhill until my return to another couple of months on the road once again. I'd be lying if I said I was looking forward to going back.
There is a glimmer of hope, however. It's a faint glimmer, almost a barely glowing ember, but I am hoping it will expand to a bright light that will show me the way out of the darkness I am in.
"This time is different," he said, trying more to convince others than himself, as he was already convinced that this would be The One Shot. Research was actually done in advance, I know more now of what I want to get myself in to, and I have no doubts or questions forming in my mind as I did when I took the path that led me to where I am now.
Okay, the path previous was a necessary evil, as without it I wouldn't have the critical component to The One Shot that I do now. I could have done without the past four months, in terms of the isolation and loneliness, but I am grateful for the experience I gained.
I'm hoping to know something more by tomorrow, since I'm due to return on Thursday and jump through several more hoops before I can actually get back out on the road. And, that's assuming that my truck has been fixed and is not still sitting in the repair bay.
I'm not looking forward to the next stretch of away time. I'm at the point where I would do anything within my power to make it not happen. I got this way right before the last time I went out. And, I'm quite sure it will continue to happen each time I have moments like this.
The One Shot, right now, seems to be the only hope I have left. And I refuse to give up on it.
I just hope it doesn't give up on me.
There is a glimmer of hope, however. It's a faint glimmer, almost a barely glowing ember, but I am hoping it will expand to a bright light that will show me the way out of the darkness I am in.
"This time is different," he said, trying more to convince others than himself, as he was already convinced that this would be The One Shot. Research was actually done in advance, I know more now of what I want to get myself in to, and I have no doubts or questions forming in my mind as I did when I took the path that led me to where I am now.
Okay, the path previous was a necessary evil, as without it I wouldn't have the critical component to The One Shot that I do now. I could have done without the past four months, in terms of the isolation and loneliness, but I am grateful for the experience I gained.
I'm hoping to know something more by tomorrow, since I'm due to return on Thursday and jump through several more hoops before I can actually get back out on the road. And, that's assuming that my truck has been fixed and is not still sitting in the repair bay.
I'm not looking forward to the next stretch of away time. I'm at the point where I would do anything within my power to make it not happen. I got this way right before the last time I went out. And, I'm quite sure it will continue to happen each time I have moments like this.
The One Shot, right now, seems to be the only hope I have left. And I refuse to give up on it.
I just hope it doesn't give up on me.
Welcome to the threadbare tapestry that is my mind.
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